patience...

I am not a patient person.

I have come a long way, living 2 years in Honduras, a country filled with people who will wait and wait and wait and wait and wait in lines without a *peep* of complaint.

Looking back, I feel that I have grown a lot...but of course, this process never will be complete.

Of late, Honduras has been trying with all its might to beat these last remnants of impatience out of me.

And its a painful process.

...extra steps in every small task...
...hours wasted waiting for people who say they are coming "right this very minute" (Honduran translation: anywhere in the next hour and a half)...
...always making the extra effort to adapt and then finding out it's never enough...

It gets to be exhausting.

Mixed up with all of this, I have been forced to say goodbye to some really great friends who have supported me in all aspects of life here. From the daily mundane, to the lessons that are shaping me, they have been there for me. And its hard to say goodbye.

But in the midst of everything, there are bright spots too. And God is faithful, even when it all seems a bit overcast.

I am thankful for a great MCC support network in Honduras that will remain even though there are always shifts in personnel. 

I am thankful for great friends who might not be living in the same country, but will always be connected.

I am thankful for new friendships that God has brought into my life just when I needed it.

I am thankful for a rich experience of living in another culture and all of the interesting, crazy, ridiculous, unbelievable and challenging things it has brought my way.

So it is in this spirit that I must carry-on, knowing that God is faithful in what he promises. That there are more good things to come...if I can only

wait.

esperanza

I have never really thought of myself as an impatient person. Ok, well, lets take driving/road rage out of this conversation for a minute :) I am usually a patient person, or at the very least, I think I'm good at hiding my impatience. 

However, being in a culture that does not reward punctuality has taught me a lot about patience--and probably more about impatience. Though I am pretty good at hiding it, I am often impatient...as I wait for my family to get ready to leave the house (when the set departure time passed 30 minutes ago)...as I wait for the bus to start moving at each of the 16 stops on the way down the hill...as I wait for an 8am meeting to start before the clock reaches 9:20...as I wait for an email to pop in my inbox while I work...the list could go on.

The amazing thing is, Hondurans seem to have endless amounts of patience. Or if they don't, they are really good at faking it! I can't even count the number of times I have seen women contently waiting for a meeting that should have started 40 minutes ago. Or looking out the window on the bus, never once worried about what time it is, or what time it will be when they get where they are going. I guess it's a requirement to survive in a non-time-oriented culture...but it still amazes me and inspires me every time.

The interesting thing is, the verb for 'wait' in Spanish is esperar. So often, waiting has such a negative connotation for me, or at the least, brings to mind sources of frustration. But this week of anticipating has especially reminded me that in Spanish, 'esperar' also means to hope. And I love that these meanings are so intertwined. Although I become exasperated waiting, I have a hope for so many things to come.

I have been waiting for some things in my life...but...not everything comes the way you want it. However, I have a hope that these things all work together somehow...and that each part of the journey, the fun stuff and the crappy stuff is somehow being worked together for my good. So...I continue to wait, but I wait with hope that God can do even more with all of this than I could even know to ask for, or imagine.

This week is an exciting week, as we remember the coming of Christ as a baby, and wait with hope for his second coming. May our patient waiting for his return remind us of the hope we have in Jesus Christ that sustains us in our impatience.

(I am also waiting for the arrival of some special visitors to Honduras! Please keep my family in your prayers as they travel here next Monday to spend some time with me. I am hopeful that it will be a fun time together and a time of relaxation and rejuvenation for me.) 

Oh, and a couple Christmas festivities I am waiting for...

>Making Christmas cookies with the host family tomorrow night (totally new for them, and they are stoked)

>2 more cuchumbos (gift exchanges w/ church group and extended family)

>December 24 (the big holiday-day in Honduras)

>C-mas lunch with some North American friends on Saturday

>Learning to make tamales...and eating lots of tamales

>cohetes (fire crackers) at all hours of the night and for the "old year" (año viejo) celebrations