A few weeks I was invited to attend my church's women's reatreat. Growing up in the church, I had my share of "church retreat" experiences. From camps and conferences to youth and women's gatherings, I thought I had pretty much seen it all. Even since living in Honduras, I have had several youth retreat experiences and was pretty sure a women's retreat with the mennonite church in Santa Rosa was nothing I couldn't handle.
I can't actually imagine that I could have been more wrong.
It was...out of control. It was frustrating. It was moving. It was an intense 3 days, like nothing else I have experienced in my Honduran experience thus far.
First of all, I thought a women's retreat was for all the women of the church. What I learned is that women attend the retreat once and are good for life...once you have had your "retreat" experience you only go back to serve instead of receive. It is a chance to invite your un-churched, heathen friends to help them get their lives back on track.
So we started around 5:30 pm on Friday evening with 4 plenary sessions. By the time those were over, we were divided into 2 groups, had to come up with a "chant" for our group, and were forced to turn in our cell-phones. I was not a happy camper.
Then we got on a bus and headed to the chuch retreat center about 30 minutes outside of Santa Rosa. Once there, we had another plenary session or 2 (they all run together) and finally ate dinner around 9:30. We had more sessions after dinner with intense prayer times where most women were prayed over and slain in the spirit.
Late nights...early mornings...didn't even have a clock to know what time it was, which maybe helped. We had more plenaries in the morning, including a very long one from my boss, Ruth. After another time of prayer, tears, and much fainting, we had a time of worship where we were all required to dance around and sing about how free we were.
The afternoon included a session on dating, saving sex for marriage, and even a wedding! Little did I know things were just getting started. We had more sessions, more singing and dancing, all leading up to the evening dinner which was meant to be like a honduran quinceanera or what we would think of as a Sweet 16 party. All the women were honored, those who did celebrate their special birthday, and those who did not. We even danced with the birthay court, rocked in the rocking chair, and received our wedding rings to remind us of our purity covenant with God.
Then, on Sunday morning I was rudely awoken by the loudest music I have heard in very very long time, vey close to my head. I am not a morning person, and this did not amuse me in the least. What I thought was a prank from the youth group boys on night-watch turned out to be an intentional 4 am serenade to make us "feel like princesses." Let's just say that message was lost on me. In my kingdom, no one should wake me up before 7am.
So, that got my day off to a pretty bad start. Add to that not being able to go anywhere alone (yes, even accompanied to the bathroom), no down time from start to finish, continual bombardment with worship practices that are not familiar or comfortable to me and by Sunday afternoon I was done with this retreat. But, I still had to get through the last sessions on prophetic words for our lives, a bus ride back to town, singing most of the way, a rowdy welcome back to the church with a human tunnel, much dancing and balloon-popping, and being forced to share a testimony.
It is hard for me to adequately express how I felt after this whole weekend...I did enjoy some parts of it, and there were some good moments. The other women at the retreat were unique and interesting and we did develop friendships. Moreover, it is good to take time out of the normal routine to spend time with God, talking to Him and listening for his direction.
But I was frustrated by so very many things. For one, I do not like being followed around and forced to be with people 24-7. I am an extrovert, but I need my alone time (especially in the bathroom).
Secondly, I have adjusted to deep immersion in Honduran culture since I arrived, but I always need time to process what I'm learning/seeing/doing. Whether it is time alone to journal, a convo with my fellow ex-pats, or a sarcastic text to my BFF in Teguc...I need it! It keeps me sane. And most Hondurans do not understand this or know how to deal with my sharp tongue (I prefer sarcastic wit, but I digress).
Through it all, it is necessary to step back and look at this experience with a broader perspective. Church traditions are as complex as the culture they are wrapped up in, creating the diverse flavors of Christianity we find the world over. I am confident that my own church traditions would be equally intimidating/uncomfortable/puzzling for many of my Honduran friends.
And so I have to appreciate these experiences for what they are, taking advantage of the chance to get to know another culture more intimately, to learn more about myself, and to explore how I see God working in the not-so-familiar. While I don't relish the thought of another church retreat, I have to add it to my growing list of stretching experiences as I learn to appreciate the positive moments in spite of others that may drive me crazy!
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